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A fair and balanced compendium of spontaneous exclamations and excited utterances, with 22 entries on the front page. And, now, Home of the YATSASS™ Reports Yet Another True Story About Stupid Studies: • Breathing Bus Exhaust is Stressful • Depressed People May Take Drugs To Feel Better • Smart healthy people choose foods more wisely than stupid drunks • Stressed Out Moms Think Their Babies Are Annoying • People Are Groggy When They Wake Up • Airport Screeners Probably Can't Stop Spread of SARS & Flu • Study on Studies Yields Disappointment! • Lengthy Study with No Findings! A perfect YATSASS! • Making Fun Of Fat Kids Depresses Them • Drinking Highly Sugared Beverages Can Make You Fat! • Americans Prefer Safe & Effective Drugs to Unproven and Dangerous Ones • Study Shows Poor & Homeless Drink More Malt Liquor • Study on People in Studies Yields Predictable Answers, But Also Raises New Questions • Women Don't Like Getting Up to Feed the Newborn While Their Husbands Sleep Like Babies • Sperm Levels Drop With Frequent Ejaculation • People Who Don't Screw Around Get Less Clap • Swimming Can Cause Fluid Build-Up in Lungs • People Who Eat A Proper Diet are Healthier and Thinner • People who don't wet their pants feel better than people who do • Maybe Left Handed Winter Babies have More Brain Cancer, Maybe Not... • People who had nose jobs and people who didn't both like the same kind of noses • People pass more gas when they are active • Kids who spend too much time reading will get headaches • People who get drunk think others are more attractive than they do when they're sober In the old days, My thoughts were more coherent, and I could string together whole sequences of actual paragraphs! Those essays can be found here for those so interested.
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Monday, March 29, 2004 Posted 7:12 AM
  So, Am I obsessed with death... Or is it just the whole human condition? Yahoo! News - Oscar Winner Sir Peter Ustinov Dies at 82 Its a shame to have to find out how great a guy was by reading his obit. But that may be the case when you read about Peter Ustinov. From Nero to Poirot and back to Blackbeard's Ghost, this great actor could do it all with aplomb. I'll never forget his turn with Bogie and Aldo Rey in We're No Angels where his sardonic role as a murderer with a heart of gold - and a poisonous snake named Adolph - stole not only the show, but every single scene! He also wrote several plays, movies and novels. Last but not least, he served as a very active Goodwill Ambassador for UNICEF for more than 30 years. Sadly I note that, as it seems with all people who achieve public greatness, his private life was less than wonderful, having been married 3 times and divorced twice, leaving 4 children by two different women and his third wife, as he passes to the celestial stage. Sir Peter, say "Hi" to Bogey, Aldo, and Adolph for me! Sunday, March 28, 2004 Posted 9:54 AM
Another case of only the good dying young... Yahoo! News - Jan Berry of Pop Duo Jan & Dean Dead at 62 1964: Surf City, Drag City, Little Old Lady from Pasadena, Dead Man's Curve - a pre-med student with a genius level IQ - 1966: a car crash in that left him paralyzed for a year and ended his public music career - he taught Brian Wilson how to mix and produce. Where would we be without him? Meanwhile, Michael Bolton, Kenny G, Eminem continue to plague us, seemingly since the days when invertebrates ruled the planet. While I do not call for their deaths - it continues to puzzle me: Why on any given day, according to a plan we mortals shall never comprehend, when a finite number of human beings apparently must die, the divine choice is made in the way it is. Mind you its not a complaint - surely it could have been me - just a wonder out loud at the ironies of life. Bye Jan - say "Hi" to Dennis and Carl for me. Friday, March 19, 2004 Posted 8:53 AM
A sad start to the day... Yahoo! News - J.J. Jackson, Original MTV VJ, Dies I always laughed at him, and Mark Goodman, and that bobble head blonde (Tina?) ... and crushed madly on Martha Whats'ername. But they were real pioneers. Look at what we have in the music industry, and in the world at large, since MTV came to be. The truth was, as vacuous as those VJs appeared, they really did have, for the most part, genuinely credible backgrounds in music and were staking out previously unheard of - NO, make that unseen - territory. Rough as it was, it turned out well. J.J. Jackson was 62, and died of a heart attack while driving in Los Angeles yesterday. RIP J.J. - I was laughing with you, really. Wednesday, March 17, 2004 Posted 7:48 AM
Proving once again that the law is an ass... Yahoo! News - Judge Allows Release of Guns N' Roses CD I have no idea what the arguments were or their merits, but what possible good reason is there for the release of a Guns N' Roses CD in 2004? Monday, March 15, 2004 Posted 9:07 PM
Now, if a lobster could bat 400... ctnow.com - : "Undead Lobster For Dinner? Company Claims Some Of Its Frozen Lobsters Have Come Back To Life - March 15, 2004 - By JAY LINDSAY, Associated Press BOSTON -- Call it cryonics for crustaceans. A Connecticut company says its frozen lobsters sometimes come back to life when thawed." Thursday, March 11, 2004 Posted 9:15 AM
It Takes All Kinds of Critters to Make Farmer Vincent's Fritters... Yahoo! News - Meat from Farm May Have Had Human Remains Mark this one up to another case of reality following art. Anyone remember Motel Hell? A classic, a true classic. © 2002-2008 Rob Falk, All Rights Reserved. All Wrongs Denied. Your mileage won't vary; it will be less. | Subscribe to Rants!
  
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